Friday, December 2, 2011

Recognizing That Voice

     I am not a morning person.  At all.  My natural tendency is to talk with my family or work long into the night, but because my family has schedules that require them to be places early in the morning, I make myself get up and do whatever needs to be done.  If I can get on a roll, sometimes a lot can be accomplished when I get up, but then I usually need to crash at some point during my day.  Thank God for power naps!  Other times, though, I just can't get going, and my time can be piddled away on stupid stuff.  That has a way of getting me into trouble at times, so I've been asking God to help me in this area of my life.  Old habits die hard, and there have been countless times where forgiveness has been sought. 

     Another thing God's been teaching me about is the concept of obedience.  That's a constant, isn't it?  You would think that we'd get that one mastered when we are young, but somehow there just keeps on being more life lessons to be learned no matter how old we are.  He's been working on showing me how to recognize that still small voice as being His and how I am to act promptly and obediently when I hear it.  That's a tough one sometimes. 

     This morning He had a way of combining all those lessons into one.  When I first awakened at 4:30 and saw the clock, I rolled over and was just glad that Kelsey had decided to skip swim practice this morning, which meant no one had to get up till 6:30.  Then I woke up again at 5:45 and just couldn't get back to sleep.  I went downstairs in my sleepy state, sat at my computer, and had this little voice going in my head that said, "No, just get in the shower."  I continued to look around my desk at what needed to be done but again, "No, just get in the shower."  (I hate showering first thing.  I much prefer to stay in my jammies as long as possible.)  Next I successfully walked past a little pile of laundry on my kitchen table but couldn't resist the little pile of socks that needed to be matched up on top of the washer, but partway through, again, I sensed, "No, just get in the shower."  Okay, Lord, I get the picture!!  There was just something in that moment that felt so disobedient about folding my laundry even though everything within me wanted to get that done!

     So off to the shower I went.  Then all I could hear was, "Just get to the hospital."  And then I started getting scared.  What was going on with my husband or what call was I going to get that would make me so glad that I was ready to go for the day?  The feeling just wouldn't go away, so as soon as I was ready, I went downstairs and grabbed my little devotional and my Bible and read a short little thing about God's presence and peace.  God's peace totally came over me between 6:30 and 7 while I was getting three of my four kids out the door, but as soon as they were gone and I was tempted to make a pot of coffee, that voice just came over me again that said, "Just get to the hospital."  I let Kelsey know that I was leaving, and off I went. 

     When I stepped into the elevator around 7:25 a.m., it hit me that a lot of people are normally at work by that time of the day, and I just smiled and laughed at myself because it was feeling like such a major accomplishment for me.  Oh, I can get places early when I need to, but serving my family early in the mornings has been where God has had me for a long time, and I'm very thankful for that! 

     The minute I stepped into this hospital room, it was apparent that God was calling me to serve my husband this morning.  He was grumpy and irritated.  He was annoyed at how much noise can be made during the night and how many interruptions there can be in what should be a peaceful night of sleep.  He wanted his teeth brushed and his hair washed -- now!  He was bound and determined that he was going to get up and walk today.  I couldn't decide if I should be mad at the nurses for not taking better care of him or be thankful for the fact they hadn't and therefore there was a little more gumption in him today than yesterday!  I convinced him that we needed to call the nurse for a little help because all he had accomplished by last night was a few seconds of standing beside his bed. 

     By 8 a.m. two very gracious sweet nurses and one doting wife had met all his needs.  He's finally out of his initial hospital gown, and his bedding is fresh and clean.  He conquered four steps over to the chair, and they even came back later to take him on his first little walk successfully! 

     And here I sit.  My feet are propped up on his bed, my need for caffeine has been met, and my heart has been laid bare before all of you -- another act of obedience I felt compelled to do this morning.  I guess this is God's away of giving me a whole bunch of accountability partners!  My husband has now been on two little walks, and we're sitting here together waiting for the doctor to arrive.  I'm very content with the fact that the socks aren't folded but that I'm here with him.  There is nothing more important today than meeting the needs of my husband.  Thank you, Lord, for him.  I love this man so much. 


1 comment:

  1. What a great thought Jacki! I had always thought God's voice would be things that but me out of my comfort zone (i.e.telling a complete stranger about God) but thanks for the reminder that those aren't all of the things he tells us.